Does a Bear Poop in the Woods?


There should be bathrooms along the roads.  At least a porta-potty here and there.  Something.  Because let me tell you, there is nothing worse than having to go to the bathroom and there not be a place to relieve yourself.

The family and I were out at a street festival in a neighboring town.  My mistake was the free chocolate sampling. I loved the chocolate.  The chocolate did not love me.  The sensation was sudden and strong.  Of course, it didn’t hit until we were in the car in the middle of a deserted street with nothing but trees on both sides.

I was in full-on panic mode accompanied with the sweats and a little nausea.  No amount of “the dance” was going to help me.  So, I did what every proper and self respecting woman would do.  I screamed at DH to pull over.  This business could not wait another second.

I rifled through the glove compartment and found 2 squares of one-ply napkins.  The kind you get at the chinese take-out restaurant.  I practically rolled myself down the embankment and into the woods.  Not quite sure how deep I went.  My attitude was equivalent to that feeling you have when you are in the throe’s of childbirth.  You could not care less if everyone including the Pope was there watching.

So to answer my own question?  Yes, they do.  And apparently so do grown women.  Words from the wise:  Never have anything less than 50 two-ply napkins in the car at any given time.  You never know when you will really need them.


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