I have been at My Retail Job for 3 months now. Things are going pretty well. It doesn’t feel like I got hit by a Mack truck anymore. I would say it was more like a golf cart. Maybe next month, it will feel like a 10-speed. The month after that? Perhaps a tricycle.
I am enjoying My Retail Job. It’s fun. It’s stress free. I’m feeling more comfortable in my role there. But I am discovering and seeing things that I don’t usually see in a normal day.
- The elderly will go to great lengths to save 20 cents on a loaf of bread. Even if it means spending $4 in gas to do so.
- I have a bazillion cuts and bruises on my body. Most days it looks like I got into a fight with a rooster. But there are no roosters at work. I swear.
- By the end of my shift my hands look like that of a Grave Digger. You don’t want to know.
- I still don’t like using the walkie talkie, but I’m getting used to it. Although I still get that little butt pucker when I hear someone ask me a question over it.
- A man decked out in a dress, high heels and makeup looks like a man decked out in a dress, high heels and makeup.
- Your extremities can go into frostbite mode when you are in the freezer after about 3 minutes. Even with a coat, hat and gloves. Very glamorous. You wish you were me.
- Children who surround you like crows on a carcass is not creepy at all. Especially when they are staring you down. Having mother there to call them off is of no comfort. I think I’d rather be chased by a bear.
- Some parents think the isles of the store is for playing Chase. Go entertain the kiddies in the parking lot so I can get some work done. Please.
- I’m pretty sure I will slice off part of my finger with a box cutter before this gig is up.
- I cannot for the life of me, fold the top of a box so that it closes. Folding the top of a box makes the Rubik’s Cube seem like a walk in the park.
- I can’t figure out how I got this job since it seems that the prerequisite is to smoke. Oh wait. I inhaled once when I was 14. That must count.
The hours are long and I take home enough bacon to feed a hermit crab. But having my own thing, feeling like I’m contributing and boosting my confidence? Priceless. I highly recommend it. Frostbite, creepy children and all.